The holidays...from a nonstandard point-of-view.

C and I talked a little last year about the holidays - I think he was trying to distract me from my grandfather passing away in early December - and we came to a conclusion about a few things.

Before I go into that, though, I should give a little background.
Both C and I were reared in the Catholic faith, and attended Catholic schools. We both began to question the teachings of the Church early - in my case, I was in middle school. I believe he began to question things earlier than that. I don't know anything further regarding his separation from the teachings of the Church, but I know my final separation came after 2000, the details of which I will discuss another time.

Anyway, long story short, neither C nor I attend church, follow any Christian rituals, or really believe in the whole "one god" approach to faith. We've been celebrating Christmas as a secular holiday, and focus on the family closeness, food, and giving of ourselves (in the form of gifts, time, etc). We try to avoid too much materialism, and attempt to keep the holiday somewhat understated in our home. He doesn’t really subscribe to any faith, as it were – he’s too logical for that. Me, on the other hand…I believe in the possibility of something greater, but not the idea of a monotheistic religion. It just doesn’t make sense to me.
I've started to read more into the Druid faith - both current traditions, as well as what (limited) information is available of the ancient traditions. While I cannot say I'm a follower of this particular faith, I agree with some aspects of it. I continue to read about it as I get time, though I find time is a bit lacking of late. Chalk it up to working on getting more physical activity into my daily routine.

This year, I sortof celebrated the Solstice. I gave C a small gift and had a very small candle ceremony when I got up to see the eclipse (though I missed the eclipse itself). I expected it to feel silly, but it didn’t…it wasn’t anywhere near what I feel when I used to go through the motions at Mass.

Awhile back I asked what religions/faiths you follow, but I didn’t really get into it. I don’t know if it was merely a lack of desire to get into a discussion, or an outright aversion to it, but I’d like to talk about it now: what do you believe? Are you a member/follower of an organized religion? Are you a Buddhist? Pagan? Follower of the Flying Spaghetti Monster?

Oh, Humans...

This will probably anger people, but so have other posts on my blog, so here goes nothing.

I was raised Catholic. I attended Catholic schools from Kindergarten through my Senior year of High School. I went to church. I prayed. I even attended World Youth Day in 2000 in Rome.

And then my beliefs pretty much went to hell.

In being honest about who I am with those closest to me, I lost "friends" - they couldn't handle my honesty. They said I was a sinner, and therefore we could not be friends. They insisted I must change my ways, else I go to hell and bring everyone down with me. They did so under the guise of caring, loving Catholics who only wanted the best for me.

Then I admitted I was questioning my faith. This brought further backlash, further inner turmoil, further alienation from those I'd known since early childhood. I wondered how this would be possible if I were a God-loving woman. I wondered if this were considered some sort of testing by my God.

And then, I stopped it all. I stopped praying, I stopped believing, I stopped going to church, and I stopped spending time with those who were, at one point in time, the most important friends I had. And I felt free. I felt unencumbered by my fears, unfettered by those Commandments which had held me back for decades. I admit, I went a little nuts. I overindulged. I let myself experience many of the things I couldn't under the laws of the Church. And I was happy.

I'm just relieved I was able to do much of this without the denizens of the Internet reading about my journey...because I doubt I'd have been able to take it as well as this lady.

I know I'm tossing my 2-3 readers into the middle of this mess, so here's a quick recap. A bloggess called Mrs. G, who created The Women's Colony and who regularly contributed to The Pioneer Woman's Homeschooling section wrote a recent post regarding how she introduced religion into her children's lives. It's well written, and I certainly appreciated her approach (and seriously, go read the post her daughter wrote). She neither force fed them nor taught them nothing, giving them ample opportunity to choose whatever path they wanted to follow. I respect this.

Many of the readers of The Pioneer Woman, however, did not. Cue massive amounts of negative comments, emails, and even two phone calls to Mrs. G's home. People were angry...for silly reasons, in my opinion. The worst of it is how so many of them were claiming to be devout Christians, yet they were insulting everything about her; from her appearance to her method of raising her kids, they made a point to bring her down.  I repeat: they called her at home to harass her.  Who DOES that?

If anything, this has reaffirmed my aversion to organized religion. If one cannot worship in their own way (as laid out in the Bible), why bother worshiping in community at all? Furthermore, why are people so incapable of actually following the rules of their chosen religion? The most basic undercurrent of all Christian religions is one of love, not hatred for those who aren't like "us." No wonder Christians have such a bad reputation. Their loudest and most obnoxious (and seemingly least-devout) members* can't even follow the rules they preach.

I think what angers me the most about all of this - including the comments on The Pioneer Woman - is the lack of tolerance.  There are MANY religions out there, and not every one is a fit for every person.  Why can't people understand this?  Why must there be so much ridiculous fighting over something so personal?

Why can't we let each other find the best path for ourselves, and applaud each other once we've found the belief structure that fits best?


*Let it be known that I'm fully aware not all Christians are like this.  I wouldn't even say the majority behave this way...the vocal minority, however, seems to overshadow those who are following their faith as devoutly as they can.  In this context, I'm referring to televangelists, snooping gossips who enjoy causing drama, and other similarly-aligned ne'er-do-wells.

On religion

I don't tend to discuss my religious views.

Ever.

Because most of the time, people would look at me funny, and attempt to commit me.

So, instead, I read. I read blog posts my friends make as they go along their religious journeys. I read about various religions, new and old. I respect the strength of faith that allows an individual to firmly believe in their chosen religion...and I wonder what led them down the path they've taken. I find myself in the midst of religious turmoil from time to time, and that usually spurs on this thought process.

For the record, I was raised Roman Catholic. It's an alright religion at its core, but I feel it misinterprets a lot of what is printed in the bible. I also disagree with a lot of its teachings. I find myself drawn to more Earth-based religions...I suppose it has to do with the reality of the planet. I can see it, touch it, hear it, smell it. I see it change, and I respect that without it we would not exist. I don't question how we came about, as I wholeheartedly believe in evolution. I also believe there are other planets like ours, full of life and potentially intelligent species. It just seems more realistic, to me.

What are your opinions? Where do your beliefs lie?